John, 7th Earl of Marshmoreton — never happier than when cultivating his roses; often mistaken for

MacPherson — his Lordship's gardener.

Lady Caroline Byng — The Earl's sister, step-mother to

Reggie Byng — who nurses a secret love for

Alice Faraday — the Earl's secretary, regarded by former employers as a jewel, by Lord Marshmoreton as "a perfect incubus".

Lady Patricia Maud Marsh — Lord Marshmoreton's daughter, who thinks she is in love with

Geoffrey Raymond — nephew, secretary, and heir of

Wilbur Raymond — a wealthy American businessman, not destined to outlive the story.

Brenda — Lady Maud's hostess in Wales when she met Geoffrey.

Mac — stout guardian of the stage door of the Regal Theatre.

George Bevan — a young American composer, always ready to help a damsel in distress.

Billie Dore — a chorus girl, with an unexpected interest in roses.

Yvonne 'Babe' Sinclair — another chorus girl, with a poor taste in men.

Spenser Gray — a fat young man, hoping to take advantage of Babe's poor taste.

Percy Wilbraham Marsh, Lord Belpher — Lord Marshmoreton's son and heir, a stout young man, with the manner of a well-dressed but overfed bloodhound.

A messenger boy, two shabby men, a shop girl and various bystanders — members of that class which will gather round and watch silently while a motorist mends a tyre.

An hotel commissionaire — bearer of unwelcome tidings.

A policeman — "a living statue of Vigilant Authority".

Keggs — Lord Marshmoreton's butler, "a man of reverend years, portly and dignified", which just shows how appearances can deceive.

A house agent — source of much information (mostly inaccurate) about the occupants of Belpher Castle.

Mr Forsyth — a friend of Billie Dore.

Albert the page — a young man of gruesome tastes and aspirations to be a butcher.

Susan — formerly the cook at Belpher Castle; married a "pleeceman".

Mrs Platt — wife of farmer Platt, who owns the cottage George has leased.

A reporter, representing the Belpher Intelligencer and Farmers' Guide.

Mrs Digby — housekeeper at Belpher Castle; "a motherly old lady".

Emily Ann Mackintosh — authoress of Roses Red and Roses White, which, Lord Marshmoreton is disappointed to discover, is not a horticultural treatise.

Edwin Plummer — has been in love "with a different girl every season".

Millie — his sister, a great fan of George's music.

Jack Ferris — Reggie Byng's bosom friend.

Freddie — one of the Castle staff.

Rev Cyril Ferguson — curate of the parish of Little Weeting; a man of decisive action.

Willis — a village blacksmith.

Francis, the Bishop — Percy's uncle; unknowingly has a narrow escape from death at the hands of his nephew.

Augusta — Maud's aunt; enjoys "a nice long walk".

assorted maids, valets, footmen

assorted gentry — dinner guests at the Castle.

Ernestine, a waitress at Ye Cosy Nooke tea-shop.

Mr Willoughby junior — the son in Willoughby and Son, Solicitors; master of the perfectly timed interruption.

Characters who speak (or otherwise play an active part) are shown in bold; characters who are merely mentioned or who play no significant part in the story are shown thus. Unnamed characters (eg a maid, a porter) are not listed unless they have a role in the plot. Real-life persons are not listed.

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